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The O&P website and blog, forums, and wiki are where most of my new writing on M/s appears. The IE website will stay online indefinitely to host the IE Essays and lili's writings. lili and I pursued our M/s relationship from 2000 to 2008, and lili has kindly given her permission for these essays and posts to remain here, in the hope that submissives and slaves will continue to be helped and inspired by them.

A question of love

Posted by lili on Sun 8 Oct 00, 8:07 PM

A question which is often raised when discussing ownership based relationships is whether or not there must be love in order for that relationship to flourish and grow and have longevity?

I believe the answer to this is a difficult one, and I suppose it depends entirely on what kind of a Master/slave "relationship" you are talking about and indeed what type of "love" you are talking about.

In a legally bound Master/slave "relationship" (those interactions found only in slave owning societies) then no, love does not have to exist for slavery to be maintained, although often slaves did, and indeed still do, come to love their Masters (and the Masters their slaves.)

Even in the bible we read: 'but if the servant declares "I love my Master and my wife and children and do not wish to go free" then the Master shall take him before the judges. He shall take him to the door or the post of the door and pierce his ear with an awl. Then he will be his servant for life.' (Exodus 21:35.5)

We see a different kind of love develop and bind a "servant" with a "Master" where the Master is responsible for the spiritual enlightenment of the servant (for example the religious based relationship of a "Buddhist" or "Zen" Master who guides and nurtures his charge.)

There are also examples of Master/slave relationships which exclude "loving" for a specific reason. The Master-slave interaction seen in the gay leather communities in which a contract binds the slave with the Master but love is actively discouraged in order to promote and enhance the Master's sense of authority and objectification of his slave.

Personally I know that I would not flourish and grow in any relationship in which I felt unloved, furthermore I find it difficult to understand why on earth anyone would choose to spend the rest of their lives with someone they did not love. Whether that love is romantic love or some other form of love is, I feel, debatable.

Someone once asked "Is love a feeling that is, at times, shown as another feeling"?

For me, the answer to that question would be "worship".

Edited Fri 6 Jul 01, 9:49 PM by lili

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