O&P website and blog,
are where most of my new writing on M/s appears. The IE website will stay
online indefinitely to host the IE Essays and lili's writings.
lili and I pursued our M/s relationship from 2000 to 2008, and lili has kindly given her permission for these essays and posts to remain here, in the hope that submissives and slaves will continue to be helped and inspired by them.
Posted by lili on Sun 6 Jul 03, 8:42 AM
In truth we have fought many battles - though not the
type most people imagine. We do not argue or
physically fight. Our battles are battles for the mind
and we fight on the same side (although it doesn't
always feel that way). We fight for the acceptance of
our own truths, we fight against our socialisation and
we fight to free ourselves from misunderstanding.
Today my armoury is somewhat depleted, but it is not
spent. Sadly the weapons that remain are my most
powerful ones. The ones based on the things i have
to learn over the past 3 years. i fear to use them.
i'm scared that if i do they will be powerful enough
to make me powerful, to set me free.
i don't want power, i don't want freedom. i want to
know, beyond doubt, that i have neither power nor
freedom with Tanos.
Like so many submissives i come out fighting, not to
free myself, but for the reasurrance of knowing,
beyond all doubt, that i am far from free.
Edited Sun 6 Jul 03, 12:47 PM by lili